Monday, January 18, 2010
Everyday as you grew and swam inside my tummy I committed to many things. Two of those things were: I read out loud to you everyday. I started at the beginning of The New York Times Complete Book of Knowledge and read you stories about the history of rock and roll, ballet, economics, modern science. And everyday, I put headphones on that growing abdomen and played you all of my favorite songs. (Sorry about the Ludacris song that slipped in the mix. That’s not appropriate for babies.) And I wonder if these daily acts influenced your strong proclivity towards words and music. And might explain how in a perfectly normal fashion you said the word paleontologist yesterday, when you were still two.
And in your first minutes of life, we held you and you looked right in Daddy’s eyes. Having spent limited time with babies before you came, we couldn’t believe how small and fragile you were. Or that we made you. And here was something no two other people could create. And there you were, and the minute you began to unfurl your happiness into the world around us, I knew I wasn’t ever going to be the same.
I have been fortunate to be successful at many things I have tried. (And the things I am not highly successful at i.e. beating Daddy at golf or surfing do not keep me from trying.)
But the thing I want to be the most successful at is you. Being a Mom was a great aspiration but I never dreamed of fluffy wedding gowns and white picket fences as a girl. I wanted to know how to kick a soccer ball further and how to perfectly lip sync to Madonna. Oh, and how to argue effectively. You’ll see. But getting to know you has given me reason to really evaluate myself, and ask what kind of leader I will be to you. I am primarily good. I have responded with instincts I didn’t know I had. I have displayed patience that baffles my entire family. But they know the reason is you. But you bring goodness that is pure and true to light. But I am far from perfect. And in my life, I have been impatient more often than I should. And I have been unkind and ill-tempered at times. That is why I hope you only inherited certain parts of me. (And certain parts of Daddy while we on the subject.)
I made you a list and since you are turning three today, it is still early enough for you to select only the good qualities and positive influences we can share and discard the other.
Please inherit from Mom:
Sense of: humor, adventure, loyalty, protectiveness of others
Love of: music, athletics, laughter, travel, reading, cooking, and singing.
Interest in: education, diversity and culture, social issues, charity/philanthropy
Interest in style
Interest in fitness
Genetics that make Grammy look like she is my sister
Appropriately placed sarcasm
Please do not inherit from Mom:
Favored use of the F word
Interest in being right
Interest in debating (which is a nice word for arguing)
Interest in Rap Music (unless it's old school)
Interest in negotiating. Everything. (Or do inherit this and do NOT attempt to use this skill on me OR Daddy. Your grandparents can fend for themselves and thus are fair game.)
Interest in finding loopholes to get around rules
Interest in acceleration especially in vehicles
Amazing memory you will attempt to use against me at some point
Interest in frozen twinkies. They are good but actually disgusting.
Sissy scream upon seeing a snake
Smart-assery (There is a difference between sarcasm and smart-assery.)
Please inherit from Dad:
Amazing golf skills
Amazing eye color (yours look like mine at times, and his at times)
Tolerance for change
Attention to detail
Pragmatic approach to all things
Vast interest in the world and seeing many parts of it
Please do NOT inherit from Dad:
Morning grumpiness and when I say morning I mean ALL morning
Facial expressions that do not hide true feelings especially when those feelings are not nice
Poor, poor dancing skills
Hatred of making the bed every day
Fairly high interest in Tequila
Over-zealous interest in Vegas
It is a rather slight list, my little love. And quite workable I hope.
Thank you for being the best reason in the world to want to be a better person and an amazing Mom. I will do my earnest best to meet those goals.