Workshifting for Life Balance

I thought I had this personal life vs. work life balance thing in check. When I worked for another company, it was easy to leave the office early to attend one of my son's sporting events or go serve cupcakes at a class party and not think twice about it. Those e-mails could be answered tomorrow. Those phone calls could wait a few hours to be returned. I had my priorities perfectly aligned. My son always came first.
But, now that I am working for myself, I am having a harder time segregating my two lives. Technology has provided us with some wonderfully life-enhancing tools: the internet, the iPhone, the laptop computer... it makes it wonderfully easy to work on the go.
My husband is a fabulous father who not only goes to all of our son's sports games, but the practices as well. He wants to be there to see what my son needs to work on so he is the best player he can be. It's how they bond - through sports. But my son always jokes about how "Dad's on his Crackberry" checking e-mails and taking phone calls while he's throwing the ball to my son with the other hand. So, how truly engaged and in the moment is he?
Now that I am working for myself, as a partner in Gangway Advertising agency, I find that the lines between my personal and work life are blurred more than ever. I have more to accomplish than ever before and I feel the heated breathe of time right on my heels, chasing me every minute of the day.
In the old days (you know, like two years ago) an agency would develop a campaign for a client, develop ads, negotiate a media buy and then we were off to the races. The ads would run in various publications or messages would play over the radio or TV and our job was to sit back and evaluate response and return on investment (ROI).
Social media is revolutionizing the world of advertising and it's such an exciting time to be in this field. At the same time, twitter never turns off. In social media content is everything. If you don't have engaging content that people will forward (or re-tweet) and comment on - you have nothing. In today's marketing world our clients have social media strategies that call for me to find, create and post content not only on a daily basis - but multiple times throughout the day. And then there's the research and the tracking involved in growing their base of followers.

With more to do than ever before and only so many hours in the day to do it - the struggle then becomes, how to fit it all in?! If you are doing multiple tasks at the same time, are you really able to give 100% to any one thing? I used to joke that "I worked my day job from 9 to 5, then went home to do my other full-time job - Motherhood." Now, I have to figure out a way to do both jobs at 100% at the same time. Oh yeah, and find time for my friends and personal interests. (Hi friends! Remember me!)
I envy the Gen Y'ers. This is the only life they've ever known and for them the integration between their work and personal life is seamless. But I'm an old dog trying to learn some new tricks. Let's hear it for the old dogs! Woot!
Is this new life better than the old way of life. In some ways, yes. in some ways, no. But there's no turning back. How do you balance between your personal and work life? Feel free to share your tips and tricks.


- Cynthia Smoot
Cynthia lives in Dallas, Texas. She is Mother to a nine year-old son, a Mommy Blogger who's blog Oh So Cynthia talks about her life as a working Mother and a Partner and Integrated Media Director for Gangway Advertising

R.I.P. Michael Jackson

I attended my very first music concert in 1981. I was 12 years old and in the 7th grade. I had been in Hamilton, TX. visiting my Grandmother. It must have been a Sunday morning, because that's when she got a copy of the Dallas Morning News. I saw an ad in the newspaper for the Jackson 5 Triumph tour featuring Michael Jackson.
I don't know why this particular concert struck me as something I wanted to do. By the time I hit Junior High and started to get into music, the Jackson 5's were fading into pop culture memory. Michael had just recorded his Off the Wall album but it hadn't been released yet.They were at a moment in time where one of the the biggest bands of the 1960s and 70s was about to be eclipsed by baby brother and forever make them a footnote in his bio.
But, the ad hit a chord in me and I told my Mom I really wanted to go. Not much more was said about it but a couple of days before the show my Dad came to me and held out 2 tickets. He had a hotel room in Dallas and we were going. Just the two of us. (Note that $10.50 price on the ticket!)

I remember the show being exciting and electric. Michael was definitely the star of the show.
This was the set list:

Intro/"Can You Feel It"
"Things I Do for You"
"Off the Wall"
"Ben"
"This Place Hotel"
"She's Out of My Life"
Movie And Rap, Including Excerpts of:
"I Want You Back"/"Never Can Say Goodbye"/"Got to Be There"
Medley: "I Want You Back"/"ABC"/"The Love You Save""I'll Be There""Rock With You"
"Lovely One"
"Working Day and Night"
"Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough"
"Shake Your Body (Down to the Ground)"
You could tell he was on his way to bigger and better things and this concert was to launch him into the stratosphere. This was before we found out he slept in an air chamber. Before the purchase of the Elephant Man remains. Before the monkey companion. Before Macaulay Culkin and Emmanuel Lewis were his best friends.
This was when Michael Jackson just looked like a star. The biggest star in the world. I have had him on my mind a lot this week. Thinking back to this show and a man with such talent and promise could become so lonely and twisted. My heart goes out to him and his children and family. I know he is in a better place and I hope he is happy now.
He's probably teaching the angels how to moonwalk and serenading Jesus. "Mama say ma sa, Ma ma coo sa"
Cynthia Smoot/Dallas, Texas

9-1-1 Emergency!

I have a love/hate relationship with Summer.
In my community, it's been the topic of conversation for weeks with all my Mom friends. They have all been longing for school to get out so they can lounge by the pool with their kids, let the family sleep late, and take off on their extended family-vacations to their beach houses or mountain retreats.
My family? Not so much. As a working Mom, summer represents a whole new level of anxiety as I bounce Little Man from day camp to day camp to fill the weeks. Lego camp, Tennis camp, Science camp, Lacrosse camp, Football camp and on and on. And I have to make his freakin' lunch every day. It's a beating.
One of the nice things about summer is that with the change in season, it gets dark a lot later in the evening (around 9:00 pm). This means after dinner, we can still get outside and enjoy each other's company. I am fortunate to live on a fantastic block where almost every house has kids under the age of 10, so there is always a gaggle of kids running up and down the street playing ball or riding their bikes.
The other night was a typical example of what an evening on my street looks like. There were about 12 kids playing outside and Little Man was right there in the thick of it. Around 8:30 pm I was inside the house and when I hadn't seen him run by the window for about an hour, I went outside to investigate and just lay eyes on him for reassurance. I stumbled across a couple of my neighbors who were hanging out in one of the backyards talking. 4 neighbors turned into 6, then into 8 and before you knew it we were having a neighborhood block party.
Our neighbors are a spirited bunch and we have a lot of fun recounting stories about "who was your first kiss?" and debating "who is the greatest band of all time?" Now, keep in mind, that we have these little impromptu gatherings ALL THE TIME. We're talking primarily about 5-6 houses on our block who hang out together, so you are never more than 3 houses away from where your kids are.As the night progressed and it got darker, we brought the kids inside. A couple of the boys decided to watch "Indiana Jones" at my house. A couple of the girls wanted to watch "Hollywood Chihuahua" at another house next door. And for the parents who had little kids (under 5) they went home, put them to bed and when they were asleep the parents came back over to continue the conversation/debates.

One father in our group last night had a 7 and 5 year-old asleep at his house, about 3 houses down from where we were. He left us frequently throughout the evening to go check on the kids. And every time he would come back and say, "Still dead asleep." He was not the only parent there who had kids at home asleep. One Mom was holding a baby monitor in her lap listening for sounds of movement from her kids asleep in the house across the street.
Our gathering broke up about midnight and as we started to walk out from the backyard we see FOUR police cars at this guys house. He bolts towards his home and we are all standing there in shock wondering what the hell is going on. Turns out his 7-year old daughter had woken up, couldn't find her Daddy (the Mom was out of town), got scared and called 9-1-1.
He had just been at his house not 10 minutes earlier! I felt so bad for this poor guy. And for his sweet baby girl who was just doing what she had been taught to do - call the police in an emergency. The police grilled him for a while before they determined that all was well and it was an honest mistake. Poor guy. I can only imagine how horrible he felt. And how his wife will probably never let him live this down.
I couldn't help but think back to the case of Madeline McCann (Baby Maddie) who, about a year ago, was kidnapped from her vacation condo while her parents were having dinner and drinks with friends at the resort about 100 yards away. I had a lot of judgment about that case. I said, "How could those parents leave their small children sleeping and go out to dinner? And where they couldn't even see their house from where they were sitting?"
Yet, that's exactly what we were all doing. We were in someones backyard, where no one could see us. I know have a whole new perspective and sense of empathy for the McCann family. Looking back now, we can all say "That was such a dumb thing to do." Almost everyone I've talked to has told me they've done the same thing at one time or another. It was a scary situation I know will all keep with us for a long time to come and reminded me how every decision you make can have lasting repercussions.

What Every Mother Thinks, But Is Afraid to Say.

I'm going to say something on this blog that most Mothers are thinking but are afraid to say to another human being or even think in their own heads...
"I do not always love attending my son's sporting events."
There. I said it.
Out loud.
Especially baseball. The 2 minutes Little Man is up to bat, I find thrilling and exceptionally wonderful. The next 30 minutes I have to wait until he's up to bat again, I find excruciatingly dull. I like your kids. I really do. But I am not the least bit interested in their development and progress. I could care less about their home runs and caught pop flies. I want to see MY son play.Thus my loathing of baseball.
In other sports like basketball and football, even if he doesn't have the ball - at least he's on the field and has an opportunity to make a play and that makes it interesting because you never know what's going to happen. In baseball, not so much. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Does that make me a bad Mother. Nah. It just makes me an honest person.

Welcome Cynthia!

NAME: Cynthia Smoot
LOCATION: Dallas, Texas, USA
AGE: 42 (but look 35!)
HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN BLOGGING FOR: 2 years at Oh So Cynthia
WHAT IS THE BIGGEST MISCONCEPTION THE MEDIA GIVES OF WOMEN: That all we care about is baby food and shopping.
WHAT INSPIRES YOU THE MOST: My son. Looking at him every day makes me want to be a better person and achieve the most I can to give him a good example to follow.
WHAT DO YOU ENJOY DOING IN YOUR SPARE TIME: Spare time? Ha! You are funny. I'll say: Blogging, watching Reality TV shows, attending my sons sporting events, fitting in the occasional mani/pedi and lunch with girl-friends.
WHAT MADE YOU DECIDE TO CONTRIBUTE TO THIS BLOG: I can relate to your vision and wanted to help you succeed! I love the idea of having women from different parts of the world, coming from different backgrounds talk about life.
DO YOU HAVE A FAVORITE DISH: If I knew I was going to die tomorrow, my last meal would be traditionally Southern: Fried Chicken, mashed potatoes with cream gravy, fried okra, sweet corn, biscuits with honey, home-made apple pie with vanilla ice-cream and a tall, cold glass of sweet tea.
YOUR FAVORITE PLACE TO SPEND TIME: Any beach with white sand, a sunny day and sea shells waiting to be found
WHAT MAKES YOU PROUD TO BE A WOMAN: That we can do everything a man can do, and have babies. We are by far the superior sex.
BEST PIECE OF ADVICE YOU EVER RECEIVED WAS: I love this quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson "Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail".